Lee

Lee, age 14, born prematurely at four pounds, neglected and abused as an infant, came home to us at age one year (the size of a six month old), living with a completely preventable birth defect...fetal alcohol syndrome. FAS encompasses behaviors too wild and varied to list, learning disabilities, short term memory difficulties, growth deficiency, co-morbid syndromes of Bipolar Disorder and ADHD, as well as food allergies, to list a few. Although we were not able to gather his complete medical and life history until nearly age 5 years, we knew from day one we had a live wire on our hands. Lee keeps our day-to-day life much like being a test crash dummy family...living from one wild ride to the next.

His short term memory difficulties make homeschooling quite an adventure as he has to be repeatedly re-taught…particularly in math and spelling.  While Lee has many interests each is fleeting due to his inability to sustain focus and much of his time is spent wandering in circles, literally, of frustration. As with all children of fetal alcohol syndrome, Lee will always need an external brain to help him control his impulsive behavior. There simply is no pause factor between think it and do it or anger and retaliation. His brain is permanently damaged from the terratogen of alcohol while in uterus. Everything is made all the more difficult because Lee looks like any neurotypical boy, only displaying subtle physical traits of FAS, and society expects him to behave as such.  He is taunted frequently by peers due to his small stature, another effect of FAS.  Having begun growth hormone injections a little over three years ago, he remains three to four years behind in growth.

Telling you these facts about Lee cannot fully explain the stress and uncertainty of life for and with a child of fetal alcohol syndrome. Neither can it convey the passion with which he lives life, nor the love and compassion he has for others. And his laugh, ah his laughter, there is none more delightful or contagious. Lee enjoys cooking, animals, golf, video games, all things Star Wars and socializing.  It is difficult to remember a time when he did not talk, run or climb to the highest point available.

I find joy in the spontaneous fun and vitality Lee brings into our lives.